I've been focused on a family member's illness over the past week. It's amazing how much rises to the surface once something like that occurs in your life. You begin to see situations and people in a totally different way. I've been asking why some things I thought were so important are now so trivial.
What I'd like to know is why do people always ask for a status of the person's health. Yes, they want to know, but each time you have to answer that question you're revisiting that painful place. If you know someone going through a time like this, better to just let the person know you are there for them if they need you. Let the person come to you if they want to talk. Don't keep asking them every other day how things are going. Unless you can do something to change the situation, you are not helping.
Perhaps people feel like they should do something, and since all they can do is ask for a status, they do that regularly. If you are not sure what to do, I have a suggestion. Give of yourself by offering your support instead of taking by constantly asking to be kept informed. This may sound a bit harsh, but for those who have (and are) experiencing it, I think you understand what I mean.
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